Apparently my sole purpose on earth is to amuse my kids. Beside being inexplicably weird, I tend to say things they find tremendously funny. I present for your reading pleasure...
"That'll do Donkey, that'll do" or if the mood strikes me...
"That'll do Pig, that'll do"
"I choose not to run"
"But I don't want to be a pirate"
"I can't do it captain, I don't have the strength" (this is said with the worst possible accent)
"I got your six"
"Hi there" (I think the only reason this is funny is because it is always said like Dug in "UP") What's that? Who is this Dug I speak of? Well, let's look together, shall we?
Dug says Hi There...
"Your father" (this is said with great exasperation)
"Thank you Captain Obvious"
And there you have it. BTW, you get 29,000 points if you can identify which movies/shows several of these came from. Annnddd...go!