Tuesday, October 18, 2011

The "new me"

As you might remember, I recently left my job at my beloved Jr. High school. This has actually been such a blessing in disguise, I can't even begin to tell you. Anyway, I still do some sub work for them and was there just yesterday and something fantastic happened. Did you note my sarcasm there? No? Let me try again...While subbing yesterday, something "fantastic" happened! Better? Bueno.

Like I was saying...

I got to meet the new me. Alright, technically, she's not the new me because technically, my old job was eliminated and technically you can't let someone go and then turn around and hire someone else to do their job. This is not to say that this person doesn't do exactly what I did (but not as good, but that's just my bad attitude talking), working out of my office, seeing my kids for the same reasons that I saw them. But, these are just little, inconsequential details, right? Right?? Sure.

Don't distract me.

So I met "the new me but not really me" and I really intended to like her because she is working with great people, great kids and ultimately the situation that I found myself in was not in any way her fault. I was doing really well with her obnoxious accent, ridiculous "dress code" and lack of courtesy. Really, I was. Don't laugh.

Then, after I told her who I was and that I used to do what she was now doing (but not really *wink wink*), she said, "Oh, so they found something for you to do here then?". This was accompanied by the ever so sympathetic head tilt and concerned pinch of the eyebrows.  May I also point out that with these displays of "aww, that's too bad" there was a definite inflection of "Well aren't you the dumbest thing I've ever laid eyes on and it's no wonder you couldn't keep your job you uneducated piece of shit".

I didn't say, "I hope the kids eat you alive" or "Bitch please, you couldn't do HALF my job" or even "Your accent makes me want to shove hot pokers in my ears".

No, no, I smiled sweetly and walked away. And then I came home and blogged. Karma's a bitch folks and she's gonna spank this chick. And not in a good way.


  1. You did such a nice job not saying a thing. I don't know if I could have done that. Although as I age, I certainly bite my tongue more than I used to. Maybe you could have least given her a raspberry? PHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHT!!!!!!!!!!!

  2. I really wanted to! That or call her a Stupid-Head...either way.


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